throwing away Kaila's clocks

Another week has been conquered. Each one is a small success.

I am sitting on my bed genuinely trying to remember what happened today.

Have we talked about the fact that the staff at Dunkin Donuts knows me? Cause they do. There is a Dunkin literally attached to my building. Attached. There are two doorways and one elevator through which I must walk to get to the Dunkin Donuts. Direct sunlight doesn't even have to touch my skin.

I am lucky because I have never been a coffee fanatic **cough cough** like my mother. In fact, the coffee I like tastes more like melted coffee ice cream with some sugar added. This is lucky because I now have instant access to coffee virtually 24/7, and if I were of the obsessive nature I would be addicted by now.

I know that I have mentioned my ability to order breakfast from my bed, so I guess I'll explain that a little better.

See, there's this app called Tapingo. I put in my college ID, it knows who I am, where I am, and what food I can get via my lovely wonderful school. So in the morning, I turn on my phone, click on the little orange button, tell Dunkin Donuts what I want for breakfast, and it pays with my meal plan. I just have to go downstairs and pick it up. They read out the names on the orders and give out the drinks and paper bags just like a super fancy and premeditated Halloween.

About two weeks in they just sort of stopped asking for my name and handing me my food.

This routine has only strengthened my lifestyle of not standing still, which I suppose will catch up to me eventually.

We had three classes today, one in which we said the word "Ma" over and over with open soft palettes and rolled around on the floor a lot, one where we gave each other strangely specific massages, and one where we--do you remember? We talked about this--had five minute one-on-one meetings with our teacher. Terrifying.

Over all, my teacher had one note for me, and it was no surprise.

"I don't get this sense from you, like, in life, or outside of class, but when you perform the exercises it seems like you need to get through them as quickly as possible. Like you're worried you're taking up too much time. You just need to slow down and give yourself enough time to process and receive. I want to take time out of the equation. I want to throw away all of Kaila's Clocks."

I mean, can anyone really say they didn't see this coming?

My question is this: Am I really rushing through things, or do I just move through the world quicker than others do? I know for a fact that my mind jumps from one thing to another and back again before the last letter's even been typed.

You guys. I'm gonna have to slow down. Help.